The buddy system for creating a safe and secure space


A Releasing Your Unlimited Creativity discussion topic

Copyright 2006 by K. Ferlic,   All Rights Reserved

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Although a single individual, such as a rainmaker can create a safe and secure space for a creation to unfold, there are a variety of reason why it is much easier for a matched masculine and feminine pair. Not necessarily a male and female pair. Rather, a matched masculine and feminine whether or not that masculine is in a male or female and that feminine is in a female or male. In understand the roles of the whole and complete masculine and the whole and complete feminine being one can see how creating a safe and secure space for a creation is easier with two individuals. One to nurture and sustain and the other to protect and defend the creation.

What is interesting here is when one works with individuals one does not necessarily protect the creation that is unfolding from outside predators or external hazards. Rather it is to protect the individual from themselves and their past. It is to protect the flow of the individual’s creative life energy or creative spirit that is the essence of the individual which is forming the creation from the mind of the individual.

It needs to be remember many individuals have not been able to live the truth of their being. That is, they have not been able to live in alignment with the flow of their creative life energy or creative spirit because of the pain of the past and/or expectations and beliefs of the world in which it grew up. When an individual tries to live the truth of their being, they will be aligning with the flow of what they feel. In many ways what we feel goes against the mind and what the mind wants and has been enculturated to believe. Hence the individual will need to be protected from their own mind - its biases, judgements and other beliefs about who and what it is and what they should or should not be doing in and with their life.

In this regard, the feminine of the matched pair nurtures the flow of energy and calls forth the individual’s creative spirit to come out and stay out. The masculine of the match pair, literally and figuratively defends what the individual feels form from what the mind desires and what the mind expects, want and fears. On this note, the mind can become quite dramatic and defensive as it fights to protect and defend what it thinks.

Also, to create and hold the space for someone to become who and what they are when they have spent the better part of a lifetime confined in a shell not of their own making, we can expect some “explosive” type behavior when all the constrains are removed from confining their creativity. By explosive behavior we do not necessary mean anger but it can be. It is just as sudden and dramatic release of a passionate energy, the release of their creative passion. It needs to be recognized that the term “explosive” in no way means to imply bad or harmful. Rather it is just the recognition that there is always a weak spot in the armor or the vessel that was being used to contain the individuals creative life energy. That is where the energy is first going to burst forth. Exactly what it looks like for an individual will be unique to that individual. For some it is anger. For others it is sexuality. For others it is some almost obsessive creative task such a writing, drawing, or making something. Some are overcome with a deep sadness, remorse or grief at what has not been acted upon. Still for others there is just euphoria and joy.

In any case, the energy must be allowed to flow. If it is stopped or one attempts to control it, one risk allowing the patterns of the past to remain in tack - and, maybe worse yet, reinforced and strengthened. If the energy is allowed to freely flow it will drain the bound energy from the old patterns and the feelings of being.

Usually the initial flow of energy will be very strong. It is much like tapping a virgin underground oil reserve to create that “gusher.” In a sense the their creative system is flushed clear. The sensation and accompanying feelings of release and the associated freedom can then be remembered. That memory can be used as the initial calibration for the internal compass. The releases flow of energy is a way for the individual to know when they are flowing in freedom with their creative life energy. What needs to be realizes is that initial release pattern will always flow in such a way to optimize its alignment with the intention for our life and what we incarnated to do in the physical world for we will be outside of the control of mind in that initial rush of energy. How long one remains outside the mind depends on the individual. In time mind will regain control and the feeling of the flow will change as mind redirects the flow into its desires.

It some ways it is like freeing a ice jam in a river. The water is blocked and one is not attempting to divert the water into a different direction. Rather one is trying to free the water to flow in accordance with the flow path of the river. So too with our creative life energy. When in a safe and secure space, the energy within our being will flow in alignment with, or move to flow in alignment with, the original intention for our life. We only need to become aware of the direction of that flow and the feel of that direction.

In knowing the history of the individual, the particular story they tell, and what previous activities in life made them feel alive and made life worth living, we can anticipate where the energy is blocked will surface. Exactly how it express itself may be a little harder to determine and it is here creating the space most resembles the buddy system.

The buddy system is use by individuals when they move into what could be dangerous or unexpected situations. It is much like that used by fighter pilots or fire fighters where they work in pairs. Each individual helps to protect the other. One individual normally goes in to do whatever work needs to be done while the other stands guard watching and being observant for any unexpected occurrences. 

For example, in creating the safe and secure space for an individual to become who they are one might be exploring the nature of why the individual lost their ability to be in spontaneous and innocent childlike play of discovery and exploration. As the masculine individual is thrusting forward probing as to the nature of why one no longer can play, the individual may suddenly remember how they were abused by an individual in a very masculine thrusting, controlling or demanding way. It may have been a male abusing a child, a mother spanking a child to control them or a male or female bully projecting their macho image on the individual. In doesn’t matter what the memory may be. Rather than the individual probing themselves, the masculine act of probing may be all that is needed for the memory to surface. Immediately the individual’s mind will become defense and protect itself form the one probing. Here the one probing becomes the occasion for all of that past hurt and pain to surface. The one probing is not the cause but the occasion. Nevertheless the individual will move to protect themselves from the one probing. It is here the other individual of the pair, the feminine who is nurturing the individual can step in divert the mind so that it does not remain in a defensive position. In dong so, one can continue to explore how the energy is block and what needs to be done to set it free rather than becoming diverted by a response pattern of the past.

Related topic
A safe and secure space
Perfectly matched masculine and feminine
Issues around creating a safe and secure space 
A whole and complete feminine aspect of being
A whole and complete masculine aspect of being
The relation of the masculine and feminine in creating a safe and secure space

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